Sunday, April 29, 2012

Safe Havens

Things with Mr. Wisdom went so well yesterday that I feel a need to protect a very delicate new life in an incubator or special green house.   Time is funny because by the clock, we were together two and a half hours.  Some moments really do seem like forever, though, whether those moments are beautiful or tragic I guess.  I'm blessed enough to have avoided most tragedies, so I don't mean to act like I know something about Life, The Universe and Everything when I'm just another ordinary woman riding the bus down Broadway, as it were - but I know the afternoon was intense, and wonderful and peaceful.  It's the peaceful part I find encouraging and want to protect.  The intense and wonderful part I'll leave to the imagination since I remain committed to keeping Menopausal Stoners a PG-13 blog.

While Mr. Wisdom and I were suspended in eternity, I've apparently gotten a reputation on a certain social network for being a cognitively inferior bully who beats up anyone who uses the term, "socialist" or "socialism."  It's true I participated in a poorly executed conversation wherein I was trying to point out that when individuals make statements like, "Capitalism is Corrupt to the Core," it's possible that people who consider themselves capitalists (because they are entrepreneurs or feel tied to the Eisenhower era or whatever) will be offended.  It doesn't really matter whether or not Marx himself would consider that person a capitalist.  What matters is the perception of the individual hearing the statement.  Granted, I had personal issues with the individual who made the statement in the first place, and I was cranky because there have been layoffs at work, I'm sort of homeless as of 5/31 and Velvet has somehow gotten the idea that putting dirty dishes in the sink is the same as washing the dishes.

But the point I was trying to make, albeit awkwardly, was that anyone who wants to gain support for his ideas might take a moment to consider the implications of his slogans even in chat rooms where the members are generally like minded.  To me, saying Capitalism is Corrupt to the Core could easily be interpreted to mean that my dad is corrupt.  I have a few dear friends whose fathers were executive VPs for oil companies when we were all in high school, and while there's no denying oil companies had a hand in destroying the planet, those dads were nice guys at home, dedicated fathers who listened to their daughters and eventually gave money to Greenpeace because listening with love caused a little shift in the executive consciousness.

A thoughtful and committed Socialist said that my dad was a worker like all of us, which was a good point well taken - but by the time he came along, I was more concerned with the way conversations are used by some people in order to establish dominance.  Deborah Tannen describes this phenomenon at length in her book, You Just Don't Understand:  Women and Men in Conversation.


The situation deteriorated when I said that Monsanto has contaminated the food chain and BP has destroyed the Gulf while so much radiation has been leaking from Japan that Godzilla will surely rise out of the ocean - and it really doesn't matter what Marx had to say.

I understand that Marx had plenty to say about plenty of shit.  Woody has bored me into a coma with all his talk about the importance of Marx.  There seems to be a general consensus in certain circles that Marxism provides an excellent framework for understanding capitalist society - in particular socioeconomic class in a capitalist society.  I never denied that for an instant, even though I have no more intention of reading Das Kapital than I have of reading DeTocqueville's Democracy in America.   I'm reading Tom Robbin's Jitterbug Perfume.

Honestly, when Woody says that socialism would be the best system of economics and government because people don't have to struggle for food, shelter, clothing, health care, education - et cetera, et cetera, et cetera - I believe him because he has an informed, considered opinion when it comes to theories and philosophies and stuff.  But when people in an internet chat room start calling me ignorant and misguided because I feel like they're not going to stop yammering on about the benefits of socialism until PENolan admits once and for all that Socialism is the best of all possible worlds - I feel like nobody is talking about Socialism anymore.  Somebody just wants to be the Big Dog.  That's where Deborah Tannen comes in.  Sadly, I am now an example of bourgeois stupidity all across the internet.

I'm still observing May Day because what Pinko the Bear said about all of us being workers no matter where we work is true - but I knew that long before the Koch Brothers hired Scott Walker to launch a union busting campaign bent on blaming teachers for ruining the economy.  And I knew Jay Gould said he could hire half the working class to kill off the other half without ever reading Marx.  I'm pretty sure there are plenty of people who ride the bus down Broadway who inherently understand they are being exploited by rich white guys on Wall Street even if they've never heard of Occupy Wall Street.  As it happens, I knew all that stuff because I read Vonnegut and because my parents raised me to pay attention to the world around me.

I'm not a happy camper, marching in the street under a banner reading Workers of the World Unite, because when somebody starts shoving his or her ideas down your throat without taking a moment to find out where you're coming from, it feels a lot like date rape to me.  I've been date raped enough times to know that sometimes you have to stand up and defend yourself.  That day on the internet, I was defending my right to make my own decisions about how to spend my time and energy.  It's my right to leave the theoretical discussions to people who care about that in order to focus on healing the sense of isolation that has developed largely because the propaganda machine we call the Mainstream Media has so successfully divided workers from each other that we remain conquered.  Sisyphus might have gotten that boulder up the hill if he's have had some help - a few people pushing just as hard but a little farther to the left or to the right.

Now that I'm thinking about it, though, I might go to work and be with my kids after all.  It's always safe in my classroom - and I'm happy to say that it's safe with Mr. Wisdom too. But it's not safe out there in the  big, wild world or in internet chat rooms either.



Saturday, April 28, 2012

Love and other Transgressive Behavior: Thing of Beauty #50-101

I'm tidying the apartment because I have a date with Mr. Wisdom this afternoon.  We're staying in.
However, I still have time to devote a few minutes to Occupy The Mail Box.  Today I sent two requests for money back to the DNC taking them up on their offer to pay the postage in the United States.

On the back of the envelopes, I wrote:  NO MORE MONEY FOR THE CORPORATE UNIPARTY
and STOP THE WARS

On the letter itself, in the space where I could have checked the amount to be charged to my credit card, I wrote: No longer consider myself a Democrat.  Voting GREEN!  Some dedicated volunteer will read it and shake his/her head, fearful that the nation will be in worse hands with Romney at the helm, as if the same hands aren't controlling nearly all the elected officials in Washington DC.

I'm taking May Day off to show my solidarity with the General Strike, and maybe by May Day I'll be able to fire up some righteous indignation and hit the streets somehow - but honestly, there's been so much infighting about ideologies that I don't even want to be involved anymore.

It's easy to get pulled into fights with passionate people, especially before anyone has had their coffee. As much as I like deconstructing theoretical concepts, comparing and contrasting various philosophical positions and discussing the implications of current events - there are so many people who think some theory is going to save the country that I had to turn my attention elsewhere.  I absolutely see the necessity of demonstrating for our rights as workers and citizens - I just believe that diversity is ultimately strength, so that ideological flexibility allows for maximum participation.

Some people feel camaraderie and connection by joining in marches.  Others prefer to support initiatives in quiet, less visible ways with food, medical supplies, money and - quite possibly, providing a safe place for the fighters to retreat and regroup.  Hopefully those fighters won't be convinced that people like me who find labels potentially divisive are wishy washy and stupid.  Labels can be handy as shorthand, so that if you call yourself a secular humanist, for example, people have a general idea about your world view.  But when people equate their identities with their label, areas of commonality can be lost- especially when people are determined to convince you that their ideology should be adopted by everyone.

I don't understand why taking care of each other and the planet has to have academically authoritative support and a specialized vocabulary word - especially when you consider that no matter what economic and political systems a particular country has in place, as long as assholes are in charge - the people are screwed.  Everywhere you look, assholes are in charge.  Unregulated capitalism is at the root of the problem in most places - but even if capitalism is "corrupt to the core," as many people insist, it seems like those of us living in this capitalist country, breathing capitalist air as it were, working for capitalist institutions and buying products produced by capitalists are stained to some degree by that very same corruption simply by being active participants in the system regardless of our individual philosophical inclinations.

It's like driving your car down the road deciding where to buy gas.  Do you buy from the corporation that destroyed the Gulf of Mexico, or do you go with the one who has turned Nigeria into a nation where thugs in john boats are killing each other over peanut butter jars filled with crude oil?   Everyone who drives or rides in a car is depending on fossil fuels and must chose between the lesser of two evils when filing the gas tank.  We can all make more informed, sustainable choices when purchasing products - buying milk, vegetables and eggs from grown at local farms and going to the neighborhood drugstore instead of the big, box store.  Nevertheless we remain active participants in this system which leaves little room for affecting a posture of Holier Than Thou ideological purity.

When I'm choosing where to make a cosmetics purchase, for example, I shop at the Chanel counter at Bergorf's then relax in the bar on the seventh floor.  The bar at Bergdorf's is one of my favorite places on Earth, but I will not being going there on May Day.  I will not be getting a manicure either.  Bourgeois bitches are workers, too, after all.

Economic and Political theories are all well and good, and certainly when we're all sitting around the camp fire after the infrastructure has deteriorated and we're living like Planet of the Apes, we need to talk about how to manage things in the community - or the nation in case Monsanto and others succeed in turning us into a country where the fields are irrigated with Gatorade, much like the state of the nation in Idiocracy - but in my humble opinion, it's counterproductive to insist that one theory or another is so superior that until this nation adopts that system, we're doomed.  We're already doomed.

Take a few minutes to hear what Anjali Appadurai, a student at the College of the Atlantic, told the assembled delegation at The United Nations Climate Change Conference in Durban last year:



Anjali was specifically addressing climate change, and certainly predatory, unregulated capitalism has contributed to climate change - just like it has contributed to pretty much every problem we have. One reason Anjali's address to the delegation was so powerful is because she avoided using "isms" and "ologies" when pointing at the failures of her elders and clearly defining a path toward solution.
 Her speech remained grounded in concrete examples and never once drifted toward abstractions.

Maybe socialism is the best of all possible worlds. It's often said that Jesus was a socialist - but we see how little influence Jesus has in Washington despite all the overt declarations of deep Christianity on both sides of the Congressional aisle.  Our leaders and officials, and more importantly the 1% of the 1% or The Owners as George Carlin called them, do not give a flying fuck about taking care of each other and the planet.  They don't care today anymore than they did five hundred years ago.

Despite the dire situation in the world at large, the kitchen still needs sweeping, the sheets need changing and the bathroom must be cleaned.  As I'm ordering my own little corner of chaos, I choose to focus on the human connection - specifically understanding, acceptance, gratitude and an abundance of love for every single one of us, not just Mr. Wisdom although he will be on the receiving end of that abundance today.

Yesterday at school, all of the kids and grown-ups climbed onto the window seats to watch the space shuttle fly up the Hudson on the back of the 747.   The teachers were all whooping and cheering, but I'm pretty sure half the kids had never heard of the space program or NASA, even though they mostly like the idea of rocket ships.

I wonder what these preschoolers will grow up to invent in this world they've inherited.  There's an abundance of bullshit, that's for sure.  But at least at our school, there is an abundance of determination in the parents and teachers to create a loving environment which will hopefully facilitate a shift in the societal consciousness - like Martin Luther King and Gandhi said all those years ago.  My personal hero of the moment, bell hooks, also says it in Teaching to Transgress.  Between bell hooks and Anjali Appardurai, we've found Thing of Beauty #50 - 101 (Explore Beauty Challenge, from realia)

bell hooks

Friday, April 20, 2012

Manifestation on 420

Today, at 4:20 on 4/20, I'm meeting a new friend Nicole to perform a water ceremony for the Gulf that synchs up with Dr. John and everybody down in Congo Square, New Orleans, at Soulfire4theGulf.  It's kind of a big deal for me because even though a lot of my friends connect with the earth and each other in ways that make sense to us energetically and spiritually, a lot of people make fun of spirituality and call it Psychobabble and Hippie Dippie Nonsense.  Velvet, on the other hand, says it's Witchy, and maybe it is.

Either way, it's a big deal to me to step out of my solitary comfort zone to meet someone in real life I've only known over the internet to perform a water ceremony by the Hudson.  Nicole looked into the work of Masaru Emoto to find a ceremony.  I first learned about Emoto's work via this video:



Water is the greatest conductor on the planet, so we might as well connect with each other in love and gratitude through the water. It certainly can't hurt anything, and maybe it will enhance a healing process that has already started all around the world, that makes sense scientifically and energetically although maybe Steven Hawking would have to explain it.

Anyway, that's what I'll be doing for 4/20, International Weed Day.

Meanwhile, I'll be continuing to manifest a Man. Max the psychic life coach has been helping me get a bit of clarity about what I want in a relationship, and I've been looking at the ideas inside myself that block that relationship from happening, which apparently leads to my personal Mandelbrot Set:  The Unavailable Man.  I've written a paragraph that states my intention and desire clearly.  I'm going to write it down by hand and burn the paper, then mix the ashes into a little water bottle so that I can pour them into the Hudson after Nicole and I are finished with the Water Ceremony for the Gulf.  It's like a message in a bottle to my man, where ever he is - only without the bottle because, you know, that's not biodegradable or sustainable.

Happy 420, y'all - and if you're near the boat basin at 4:20, look in the bar for two redheads of a certain age.



All I know---we've got to change what's happening
Something good could happen
I feel light has got to come through---and I need it
Something big and lovely
I want the world to change for me---gotta get away---away from Z

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Soulfire4theGulf and The Miracle

(Crosspost, Roundtree7.com)

In just a few days, we will arrive at the two year anniversary of the Deepwater Horizon disaster that contaminated the oceans in subtle, unrecognized ways for generations to come.  Even though this planet, our Mother Earth, will continue to perk along long despite humanity's effort to commit species-wide suicide, the planet could still use our help.

When we look at the sociopolitical situation - globally, locally and nationally - there is plenty of reason to despair.  In my view, George Carlin continues to provide the most accurate assessment of our situation when we are trapped by the ways of the world.  Lots and lots of people confuse the Ways of the World with Human Nature.  There is nothing at all natural about the Ways of the World.  Those individuals who have successfully stomped the earth and her people into submission have never once valued the natural cycles of the seasons or the beauty of the human spirit.  Daniel Quinn, in his novel Ishmael, calls these people the Takers.  Certainly the Takers dictate and dominate the Ways of the World.  Dick Cheney and Rupert Murdoch come to mind, and then there's dear old Tony Hayward who lamented in May, 2010:
We’re sorry for the massive disruption it’s caused their lives. There’s no one who wants this over more than I do. I would like my life back  (Think Progress, 5.31.10).  
See for yourself:


Two years have passed since the explosion that killed 11 workers and continues to pollute the ecosystem with the ongoing use of the dispersant Corexit used by The Corporation and the hired thugs in Congress to perpetrate the myth that there is nothing wrong with the Gulf.

Activists like Cherri Foytlin (Voices of the Gulf) have worked tirelessly since the early days of the crisis to speak truth to power and inform the public about the direct impact the explosion had on the health and general welfare of the community.  We could say local community or the area - but the impact is so widespread that the community of the entire planet has been jeopardized.  Sadly, the incident in the Gulf is not the only example of the damage done by Corporations to the planet.  We can look at Monsanto and the food chain, Fracking and the water supply, or Health Insurance Companies who define the conversation about health care in America - because really, all Congress and the President ever talk about is what kind of insurance we're going to have and how We the People can pay for that insurance as if buying into a crappy HMO somehow equals health care.

Occupy Wall Street took to the streets last fall focusing new attention on issues that hundreds and hundreds of dedicated, determined activists have been working on for decades.  Although it's clear that our political and economic system needs to change - and that none of the Owners ever gave workers our rights unless we demanded them - confrontational demonstration can often be divisive because passions run high and there's a lot of Ego involved when people are trying to prove a point.  Osori addresses this internal division in his story Aztlan and Death in the Desert and May Day Occupiers.  Some Occupiers in Oakland and around the county - whom I choose to label Adolescent Suburban Anarchists due to their one-dimensional, egocentric way of expressing their opinions - have been very dismissive of people of color and immigrants who fear deportation.  We should be able to reach a consensus and stand together as a community.  When self-absorbed voices shout down legitimate concerns raised by sensible people, we are divided against ourselves.  There was a similar situation involving members of the drum circle in Zuccotti Park.

So between the entrenched greed of the Owners and the egocentric foolishness among those who could be demonstrating together in solidarity - as well as the overwhelming number of single issues all crying to be addressed - we clearly need a Miracle.

Dr. John, a musician who has been called, "the living embodiment of the rich musical heritage exclusive to New Orleans," has partnered with Mz Imani and Turtle Women Rising, a ceremonial drum collective founded and led by indigenous women, to get working on this miracle.

The party starts at 8:00am on April 16 when the Krewe of YOU comes together in Mandeville, Louisiana at Fountainbleau State Park.  The ceremony culminates on 4/20 with an All Nations Drum Circle in Congo Square from 1:00 - 4:00, and at 4:20 on 4/20, there's a procession to somewhere.  I'm not sure if they're going out to the ceremonial fire in Mandeville or what.  I just know it's 4:20 on 4/20 and that's got to be a good thing.

Here's your invitation:



For all of us who have heard this call, but can't be in New Orleans right this minute, there are Satellite Circles and Synchronized Ceremonies all over the country - or you can totally have your own circle near the water where ever you are.   I heard about Soulfire4theGulf through Gwendolyn Holden Barry's blogtalk show Here Be Monsters.  Thursday nights focus on the Global Consciousness Shift, and Mz Imani was on talking about standing FOR the earth and peace.  That resonated for me because all this fighting and protesting wears me out.  Plenty of people get off on "debating" about capitalism vs. socialism, atheism vs theisms of all sorts, and other topics bent on deconstructing vocabulary words for their own intellectual entertainment.  That's all well and good if it makes them happy, and I'm all about people doing whatever they need to do to be happy.

While they're all busy shouting and fussing and trying to convince everybody that they are RIGHT, I'll be out somewhere near the water here in New York City with Nicole Tomassini.  We'll be drinking and beating little drums somewhere where the cops aren't looking - like maybe the 79th Street boat basin.  I wasn't aware until this morning that Imani put our little solidarity gathering up on the Soulfire4theGulf website - but we're up there with Gwendolyn Holden Barry in Lake Worth, Florida and a bunch of other folks having solidarity gatherings.  I don't know what we're doing, but we're doing it at 4:20 on 4/20. Here's a link for information  http://www.soulfirecircles.com/soulfire4thegulf/solidarity-gatherings/

Maybe the Miracle this planet needs has nothing to do with changing The Owners.  It's pretty clear nothing is going to change those people.  It could be that when we all stand together, unified in a call for peace, sustainability and community - that's the Miracle.  As that Miracle spreads around the world, from one little point of light to another, the consciousness shifts.

You are all officially invited to join us.
When Dr. John sends out a call, the more the merrier - that's guaranteed.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

No Day But Today

The folks who own my ideal apartment have given the original bidders an opportunity to match my bid, since they had already accepted that offer.  Hopefully, those buyers will think that my ideal apartment is such a mess that they can't imagine why anyone would offer full price.

I don't think it's a mess, though.  I think it's absolutely charming in every single way - except I do wish we could have a dishwasher.  The waste water pipes in the building are so old that those modern conveniences could cause trouble.  The good news is that back in the olden days, the sinks were so big and gorgeous that you could do the laundry and wash the kids at the same time.  My ideal apartment and (hopefully) new home has all the original fixtures from the olden days.   There are new pipes bringing the hot water to that beautiful sink and amazing bathtub, and new wires bring electricity safely to the apartment via the dumbwaiter.

Some people, however, could be daunted by the peeling paint and might think they need to do so much work to modernize the kitchen that it's not worth the money.  I can't imagine why you'd want to modernize it - except for a new stove, vent hood, microwave, more cabinets, new floor, and then there's the situation with a structure somebody built to be storage with a counter on top that's got to be removed and replaced.   Some people could find all that so overwhelming that their minds could be reeling this very moment.  Reeling so thoroughly that they say, "Well if Tricia wants it that badly, we may as well let her have it."   That way I won't have to outbid them again.

And truly, I'd prefer to keep as much money in my own bank account as possible since I still have to get my teeth fixed.

My mother feels compelled to say things like, "Don't count your chickens . . . " while I've been imagining myself unpacking my china and placing it carefully, blissfully and gratefully in cabinets with so many layers of paint on them that a has-mat crew would have to come in if I ever wanted to strip them back to the original wood - but that's the reason we named her Mudgie in the first place.  

When I was pregnant with Velvet, I decided my mother's grandma name would be Mudgie since she's such a determined curmudgeon.  Velvet hasn't seen this place yet, but he was totally proud of me for telling those people up at the outpost to shove it.  Those sellers are freaking the fuck out at the moment.  Their lawyer was on her way back to Shanghai yesterday, but she called my lawyer to find out more about my terms and conditions for signing that contract.  It's too bad that I can't imagine signing that contract under any conditions anymore - except for maybe twenty thousand dollars less than I originally offered.

They can bite me.  
Or I'll bite them, once I get my teeth fixed.

Here's the kitchen - let's just say MY kitchen since we're manifesting with all our might right now.

Here's the floor plan:
My room is the one with the bigger closet.

Here's the song -  No Day But Today


And here's Jesus, with a face palm, since he still can't believe so many people cause so much shit for no reason.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Busy, Busy, Busy

Busy, busy, busy is what a Bokononist whispers "whenever [he] thinks about how complicated and unpredictable the machinery of life really is." [Cat's Cradle, 32 ]
From http://www.cs.uni.edu/~wallingf/personal/bokonon.html

As it happens, the contract between me and the sellers went back and forth between my lawyer and theirs so many times that my lawyer was compelled to advise me that the sellers and/or their attorney are so unreliable and crazy that I could very well wind up in litigation.  I have therefore walked away from that apartment.  The financials of the co-op itself were rather shaky, and when that risk was compounded by the  risk associated with their mishigas - including the fact that their lawyer was so goofy she would have personally held up the closing until mid July in order to accommodate her vacation schedule - I have told my lawyer that I'm not signing any contract unless it stipulates that we will close on or before June 15 (the last day my letter of commitment from the bank is good) and that if we go beyond June 1 due to their tenants, I want $5000 to cover additional expenses incurred due to their bullshit.

Since there's no chance in Hell the sellers will agree to that, it looks like the tenants don't need to move after all.  In a perfect world, the tenants will move anyway and the sellers will be stuck with an empty apartment in the city, rendering them unable to buy a house in the suburbs which they had hoped to do before their third child is born later this summer.  Who knows?  Maybe they'll think of that tomorrow and agree to my terms.

By that time, however, I may have made an offer on a different apartment.  There is no view, and the light kind of sucks, but I could walk to work, and even if I get in a bidding war in order to purchase said apartment, I'd have enough money so that I could go away for the weekend and have all the views I need.  Sadly, the owners of that apartment have already accepted an offer, but there's no contract yet.  So I need to be prepared to seriously move forward today at 5:00 if I really like the apartment.  Fortunately, I have been researching that neighborhood too, so I'm prepared to make a full price cash offer if I need to.

Huzzah!

Meanwhile, here's some unexpected words of wisdom from Alexyss K. Tylor

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Hot Water

Yesterday, I woke up with a plan.  I would get straight in the shower and wash my hair, then fuck around in the morning like I always do so that my hair would be dry when I went to work.  I jumped out of bed, since I'm generally cheerful and energetic in the morning, and went to turn on the shower.

Tepid water.  This building has always had unreliable hot water, but I was a bit surprised since the heat was on in the building yesterday which usually means the water gets so hot a body can't hardly stand it.
I had a choice:  Take a tepid shower at 6:00am or go back to bed and read for a little while.  I opted to read.  When I went back to the shower about a half hour later, the hot water was so hot that I barely needed to turn on its tap.  I had a long, lovely hot shower - which is exactly what my shoulder likes to comfortably face the day - and my hair was dry by the time I went to work anyway.  More importantly, I wanted to do that reading, and if I'd have started fucking around like I usually do in the moorings, I may very well have neglected the reading all together.

It all goes to show that sometimes when things don't go according to plan, it works out better.

Once the building turns off the heat for the season, the water won't get hot no matter how long you wait although it's comfortable enough for the summer.  The summer is irrelevant, however, since I'm not planning on living here a minute longer than necessary regardless of how things go with the Riverside apartment and the dumb ass lawyer from Shanghai.

Naturally the entire episode reminded me of Mr. Wisdom and the way this relationship has not gone according to plan.  The thing is that because I heard the steam coming up in the building's pipes, I could choose to entertain myself for a little while with confidence. If the steam pipes had been stone cold, I would have gone ahead and taken the tepid shower, cursed the building, and wrapped myself in my fleecy robe.

Most likely, I'd have done the reading - but I doubt I'd have washed my hair since I could have fluffed it up with some product or pulled it back with a clip.  The thing is that I wanted to look decent yesterday because I wanted to go sign the contract for the new apartment and then have a glass of champagne with Velvet and Gigi at Cafe Lux.  That didn't happen either.  Naturally the delays and difficulties with this contract are also reminding me of Mr. Wisdom because I figure that he's not going to call me until his separation agreement is successfully re-negotiated and signed.

No matter what the legal situation is with Mr. Wisdom, I have enough experience to be fully confident that there was steam in his pipes, but relationships are not as predictable and reliable as physical science.  At least I think it's physical science.  I absolutely recall taking a class in junior high school that involved balls and inertia and stuff like that.  Not there was inertia in Mr. Wisdom's balls, although I must confess I fear that when there's nothing happening to keep a ball rolling, it will stop rolling.  I'm pretty sure that's physical science because the ball has stopped - or the water is hot - regardless of the state of the observer so it can't be quantum stuff.  Or at least it can't be any more quantum than anything else since some people will look at a dead ball and swear it's moving - or they will argue that there are molecules spinning around atoms in there so it's moving even though we can't see it.  When it comes to things like balls, I don't think we should have to get a subatomic microscope to discern the movement.   If I can't see the ball rolling with my own two unaided eyes, then it's not going anywhere in this universe and quantum theory can go suck balls.

As I've been going through all this stuff with finding an apartment, I have noticed that the process is similar to creating a relationship.  First you have to find a place that meets criteria, then you have to go through a bunch of negotiations.  Sometimes those negotiations make sense, and sometimes they don't - but either way you have to reach an accord with the other party, and before you even start negotiating you have to have to take a leap of faith that you're going to be happy in that place and that the other party isn't keeping any essential yet damaging information hidden.  Once you jump through all the negotiation hoops, you make a huge commitment that may or may not involve every penny you're going to have for the foreseeable future - and you're still taking a leap of faith that you're going to be happy in the place when you're committing your resources and your energy.

It's easier with real estate than people, however, because with a house, you really can fix certain problems.  You can simply knock down a wall with a sledge hammer for example.  People and their walls are more complicated.  Some walls never come down.   In a house, there are load bearing walls that can't ever come down - but at least you can paint the wall a color that you like, or you can turn it into a pillar or hang art on it or something.  And one thing is sure, you want a good foundation that can manage the load whether you're talking about a person or a house, too.

Either way, it's much easier when you're talking about a house because concrete is concrete and once you get certain information, decisions are clear.  You learn to accept the neighbors whether you love them or not - I guess you could stretch the relationship analogy here and compare neighbors to in-laws or the kids that may be part of the package.

I really did want to sign the papers Friday - but when I woke up Friday morning and realized that there was nobody around to celebrate with on Friday, I was kind of bummed.  It's nice that Gigi and Velvet are on standby so that we can have champagne at Cafe Lux today or tomorrow.  If the contract isn't signed after tomorrow, though, I may decide to walk away from this whole deal on account of general stupidity in the other party.  That's not so different from a relationship either.

I like the Riverside apartment a lot, but there are plenty of other apartments in New York City.  It met one set of criteria, but it's a bit of a stretch for me financially at the moment.  In the long run, I'm absolutely sure it's a good investment because I did the research so I'm willing to gamble. That kind of reminds me of Mr. Wisdom, too, because even though he's certainly not the only man in New York City, I've done enough research to know a good bet when I see one.  It's too bad he turned out to be unavailable, but like Scarlett says, "Tomorrow is another day."