Family Real Estate Drama = Another Sleepless Night

I was up in the night again.
There was no worry about Velvet, so it must have been the moon, the equinox or something else entirely.

I'm supposed to be working on a project for my parents that revolves around balancing the Karma with their former real estate agent who is a greedy liar and accomplished fraud whom I will call Lucy.

UPDATE:  Success!  I got the documents online HERE

My parents and Lucy have known each other for years because she sold them a house in Houston back in the mid 1970's.  Mother used to flip properties back then, and Lucy handled those transactions.  I don't remember her at all from when I was in high school, but I'm told she came over for coffee regularly.  Anyway, when my parents moved back to Houston, they looked her up, and she sold them the house they are living in now.

Once they got settled in, it turned out that the former owner of this house was some sort of lying jackass and Mother successfully sued him.  During the process, Lucy started dropping by for coffee again since she lives nearby.  Looking back, she may have been worried that her own bad behavior would come to light during that lawsuit, but at the time it simply seemed like she had developed some sort of affectionate nostalgia for our family.

She began inviting my parents to join her and her husband for dinner and stuff.  One Christmas when my brother, my sister and I were all in Houston, Lucy and her husband came over to my parents' for cocktails.  We were stunned by the resemblance between Lucy's loudmouthed, cigar smoking biggot of a husband and Rush Limbaugh.  She agreed with his pronouncements with such consistent ignorance that we have been calling them The Limbaughs behind their backs ever since.

About six months ago Mrs Limbaugh was over for coffee one morning when I was in Houston.  She stood in my mother's kitchen and declared that the Jews first broadcast inter-racial kissing on TV because they want to exterminate white people. I was so stunned that I could only say that I thought Jews were White People. After a brief discussion, I wound up loosing my temper and hollering at her for being completely stupid.  Later that afternoon, I went out in the front yard of my mother's house and yanked that bitch's For Sale sign right out of the ground.

No one in the family could understand why my mother gave That Woman the listing on her house when she decided to sell it over a year ago. My mother had her reasons. I can only conclude that Mother and Mrs. Limbaugh are somehow involved in a Sacred Contract, as described in the book by Carolyn Myss. Myss says that we enter into relationships with some people in our lives in order to learn specific lessons. I'm not sure what my mother is learning from this rabid cunt, but I've learned to go with the flow.

Mother has a new real estate agent now - even though it's pretty clear that nobody is buying her house any time soon. She found this new real estate agent through some local web forum and chose her because her comments suggested she was a Progressive Democrat. New Lady is thorough and detail oriented, and when she was trying to understand how it happened that my mother seemed to have overpaid for her current house, she uncovered evidence that Mrs. Limbaugh committed fraud.

Before Mother had this information, she had always known that the real estate agents in the neighborhood avoid working with Mrs L.  The thinking seems to be that Lucy is the kind of money grubbing manipulator that tarnishes the heritage in Texas of everyone selling properties.

Mother had always suspected that something had been fishy when she first bought this house, but she'd never been able to connect all the dots. After New Lady said it looked like Mrs. Limbaugh had enlisted the aid of a crooked appraiser to sell the house for substantially more per square foot than the comparable properties in the 'hood, Mother did some investigating. She finally went out for margaritas with a neighbor who had remained best friends with the woman who lived in the house mother was originally supposed to buy. The family has since moved to Arkansas. They were fixing to close on Arkansas' house when Mrs. Limbaugh threw a turd in the punch bowl. The moving van was already at my parents' home in Dallas when Mrs. L called my mother and said to put her stuff in storage because Arkansas could not move out, my parents could not take possession of the new home as arranged. Over margaritas, mother learned that when Mrs L made that fateful phone call, Arkansas had already moved. Mrs L told Arkansas that my mother had changed her mind about buying their home because her daughter didn't like the windows.

Lies, Lies, Lies.

A couple of days later, Mrs. L just happened to pick up a new listing on a more expensive house down the street. When she sold it to Mother, she was both the buying and the selling agent (Dual Agent) ergo: she could keep the whole 6% for herself instead of splitting it with another agency. My dad was sick of all this moving shit by that time and convinced my mother to buy it even though Mother always thought it was too expensive. As it happens, this disciple of Rush Limbaugh had jacked up the price and brought in a crooked real estate appraising crony of hers to seal the deal.

I'm not saying all Republicans are Crooks, but I am saying these Crooks are Republicans. Tea Bagging Republicans. The kind of shit heads who can look at the tax charts under Reagan that clearly show the tax rates were HIGHER under Reagan and continue to bitch loud and long about having a Nigger for President.

The worst part of it is that my mother knew The Limbaughs through and through before she ever gave Mrs. L the listing on her house over a year ago. But Mother felt sorry for Mrs L because her son had committed suicide. Mother believed that Mrs. L was crazy on account of her astounding grief. I continue to believe that Mrs. L is fucking toxic, but then, Mother is nicer than I am. Sometimes.

The punch line of this story is that my parents filed a complaint with the Texas Real Estate Commission about Mrs L and were told that since the apparent fraud was perpetrated over four years ago, they weren't doing a damn thing about it. The Complaint remains part of the public record, but because of the way life is in Texas, no one who is trying to find out if a real estate agent is a crook or not can access the information because the license number isn't recorded and Mrs. Limbaugh's license number is under her maiden name - or some shit like that. I'm not exactly sure what the deal is, but the result is that Mrs L is free to fuck over the public at will.

My mission, since I have agreed to accept it, is to post the documents on the internet so that the public can find the public record. It wouldn't have been any big deal if I could have just uploaded the PDF file to a Blogger Blog that I created for Mother called On My Broom, but for some reason, that isn't working. Maybe the file is too big. I don't know. So I bought a domain name from Godaddy in order to upload them straight on to a web site (conveniently named after this real estate agent. Mrs. Limbaugh already owns her name dot com. I bought her name dot org because I'm evil that way).

So I have to make this web site and I don't have a clue how to go about it. I have Websites for Dummies, so I should be able to work it out, but I feel bad because I haven't done it this week like I promised my mother I would.

I think that may be what's keeping me awake.