Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Little Bits of Paper

In her collection of essays Grace (Eventually), Anne Lamott tells the story of teaching a Sunday School lesson on the Wailing Wall to 3 - 6 year olds. It was a small class and she had fun making a mini wailing wall out of paper bricks with the kids. They even stuck paper moss between the bricks. The point was about how writing down your worries and giving them to a higher power can be relaxing. She writes hers down on tiny bits of paper and gives them over to the elves in her glove compartment. Anne Lamontt calls these Prayers. I guess the folks putting bits of paper in the Wailing Wall considers them Prayers, too.

Velvet occasionally entertains himself by taunting me about being a Witch. This idea is, naturally, ridiculous but some people might think the way I focus my energy on a concept looks like a pagan ritual. Personally, I don't see the difference between naming an issue while lighting a few candles chosen for the symbolic significance of their colors and sticking a piece of paper with an idea on it in a wall to Give it Up to God.

I will say this, though. Writing a problem on a piece of paper and sticking it somewhere does feel like the worry has been lifted from the Squirrel Cage of your mind. Give it to God or to the Dog, someone else is worrying about it for you.

All this thinking simply shows I'm fretting about something these days. Hopefully, this fretting will have a positive impact on my weight. I heard from Velvet's friend Potus - the one who said I could easily play the Samuel L. Jackson role in Snakes on a Plane - that all you have to do to lose 15 pounds is drink green tea and fidget for a year.

Menopausal Stoner Diet: Eat an apple and go to bed.

I've been struggling to re-establish my parental authority. The episode with Gayle the Hillbilly Hustler severely eroded my authority. Great story and ultimately very helpful in my efforts at self-acceptance - but problematic in that Velvet got the big idea he has better judgement in some areas than I do. Perhaps he does. Nevertheless, he's still a big dumb shit in most areas because he's a seventeen year old boy. Adolescent and human developmental psychology shows clearly that there are few people on this planet more thoughtless and less aware of the consequences of their actions than Teenage Boys.

Arrogant Assholes like George W. Bush and Dick Cheney show the same type of magical thinking.

Petition Badge

Note: This is a link to a petition to appoint a special prosecutor to investigate War Crimes among officials in the Bush Administration. I saw it on Liberality's Blog.

If I admit the truth, there are times when I've been behaved with absolute disregard for the consequences of my actions. Maybe that's why I'm fretting and writing secret prayers for a second chance on bits of paper. I'm filled with fragile hopes and a budding sense of belief in Life, The Universe and Everything. As if sometimes, everything really does work out okay.
It's a Clap if you Believe in Fairies kind of day.




7 comments:

Jaliya said...

Hey sweetie, I'm with you on the mysteries and bizarre behaviours of adolescents. I hate to say this, but so many of them frighten me. There's a pseudo-gang of them who hang around my neighbourhood -- In 2008, our property manager evicted two lots of them from our building ... These kids had absolutely no regard for anyone or anything. Budding sociopaths, I think ...

I have to balance my perspective (or drive myself mad with anxiety) with the knowledge that there are sterling examples of decency, kindness, and fellow-feeling among adolescents, too ...

Keep that inner compass honed to your North Star of goodness xo

P.S. I think faeries are fabulous ;-)

yellowdog granny said...

boys dont get their smart genes till they are about 32...it is sometimes worth the wait..some times not..then they get married and get stupid all over again..
you should drop by and see anne at thegodsarebored.blogspot.i think that's how she has it listed..she's on my blog roll..shes a druid..im a pagan..we get along great..

Liberality said...

came by to check your blog out. Nice! And thanks for the linky love too.

PENolan said...

Jaliya, I can see why you'd be nervous about a gang of boys. Even the nicest ones are annoying bastards. YellowDog, I'll check it out tonight and Liberality - any friend of Kevin's is a friend of mine (you too Lisa and Utah).

It's really nice to have bloggy buddies when you're feeling fidgety.

Utah Savage said...

In my opinion three teenage boys is a dangerous gang of thugs and should be avoided at all costs--cross the street to get out of their way. Just saying.

YDG, men get smart at 32? I married three of them, one after the other, and they all were as stupid as any teenage boys. Followed their dicks around like the dogs they were. Couldn't drive well or say more than two or three intelligent words at a time either. And sniggered at any word that could be turned into a pussy reference.

Comrade Kevin said...

It's tough for the nice guys out there since there are so many less-than-stellar examples of masculinity and manhood out there to push through.

So perhaps what we ought to be doing is lifting up examples of good men and showing young men they don't have to be boorish, insensitive yobs.

PENolan said...

Comrade,
I will always be grateful to Farm & Wilderness, the Quaker Camp my son attended for six summers, for that very reason. At Timberlake, for boys aged 9 - 14, a central mission is to explore what it means to be a Man. The results have been excellent.

We can all be adolescent sometimes.

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