Wednesday, May 27, 2009

From a Former Nun

I love this old joke - one of the first I ever received via email. The woman who sent it used to be a nun and is now a prominent member of the Sirens, a Lesbian Motorcycle Club that leads the New York City Gay Pride Parade.

The Seven Dwarfs go to the Vatican, and because they are The Seven Dwarfs
they get ushered into see the Pope. Dopey leads the pack.

"Dopey my son," says the Pope, "what can I do for you?"

Dopey asks, "Excuse me, Your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in

The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and
answers, "No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome."

In the background a few of the dwarfs begin giggling.
Dopey turns around and gives them a glare, silencing them. Dopey turns back to face the Pope. "Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe?"

The Pope, puzzled again, thinks for a moment and then answers, "No Dopey,
there are no dwarf nuns in all of Europe." This time all the other dwarfs burst into laughter. Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them all with an angry glare.

Dopey turns back to the Pope and says, "Mr. Pope, are ANY dwarf nuns
in the whole world?"

The Pope answers, "I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in
the world."

The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling, and laughing, pounding on
the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks as they begin chanting:

"Dopey screwed a penguin!"
"Dopey screwed a penguin!"

This morning, just like most others lately, I'm working hard to keep my spirits up. Naturally, I have created a sound track with my iTunes for days when I'm in a bad mood and need encouragement.

I'm betting lots of folks have had to fight to be free. Now that my fiftieth birthday is directly ahead, I'm hoping that I'm about to burst through some threshold. If you believe people who are in their sixties, being over fifty is kind of liberating.


Gail said...

Hey Trish-

Great joke! I laughed right out loud! And that song? Refugee? That's the one I sent to you as "our theme song", cool huh?

Fifty and over? It's all good - Oh a few more aches and pains - but the high light? your whole life makes sense!!! only to you, but 'sense' all the same,.:-)

love you,

themom said...

I've never heard that joke - and I am still laughing. Ahhhh...lovin' the video, memories are rushing back. Now I will have that song rambling around inside my head for the rest of the day. Thanks.

Comrade Kevin said...

You have a youthful spirit and that makes you very attractive.

PENolan said...

Thank you, Comrade. You're making me seriously consider a silly idea I recently had about putting everyone who follows the blog in charge of discovering The Summer Boyfriend.

yellowdog granny said...

groan*..ha..and it is an old joke at that...
you're just a pup at almost 50...i have 15 years on you...65 is the new 64...ha

skyewriter said...

Poor penguin...

I would love to be part of the Summer BF thing. Fun!

Woody (Tokin Librul/Rogue Scholar/ Helluvafella!) said...

Stop me if you've heard this one, about this guy from Dallas who moves to Alaska, and wants to prove, right off, that he's as good or better than any Alaskan. So he's in this bar in Yakutat, and he's drinking and buying, and after a while, he pesters a local into telling him what he has to do to be a "real Alaskan."

"First, you gotta chug a liter of russian vodka. Then you gotta fuck a native girl, then you gotta kill a polar bear."

and the old guy hands the newbie a bottle.

Which the guy chugs. And in a little while he staggers out into the cold Alaskan night. Nobody pays much attention.

But about six hours later, the door of the bar crashes inward, and there's the Texan standing there. He's cut and bleeding, and his clothes are in tatters, and half of one foot is completely gone, and asa he's standing there he shouts "Alright you fuckers, where's that native you want me to kill...?"

jadedj said...

A triple whammy joke...dwarfs, nuns AND penquins. Har, har and har!

So, the littlest one and I were in a store recently (she's five), a dwarf walked by and she asks, in a LOUD voice, "Daddy, what do they call those teensy weensie people again?" I was without voice...and a bit red.

Oh, lordy, lordy, to be 50 again.

Punch said...

PENolan... Laughing out loud, I agree with Gailthemom and Comrade Kevin, that one caught me out.

Do that summer boyfriend thing,
Woody... sorry pal, old news.

JadedJ... you should have 'splained the difference between dwarf and midget, in a low voice, with just enough spill over to be almost heard.

PENolan said...

Okay - that settles it
All Yall are officially on the search committee for my next boyfriend.

jadedj said...

I'm telling ya, I've got the guy. He hasn't bit at my hints yet.

PENolan said...

And here I was thinking it was Punch

jadedj said...

Hmmmmm. Well, Senor Punch will have to speak for himself methinks.

PENolan said...

Simply a coincidence in timing - he appeared on the scene shortly after your original comment, and I noticed he was one of your Followers and is in my time zone. Yet another example of the tendency of the human brain to see patterns where there are none.

jadedj said...

Actually that's superb deduction, Watson.

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