Friday, January 7, 2011

The Connecticut Waltons

I'm having trouble getting it up to be Political.
I'm too stuck in my own Bullshit.  Many times when I've felt Political, I've said that we need to stick together so that when one of us Loud Mouthed Progressives falls down, another one will stand up and mouth off.  That one falls down, and another stands up, and so on and so on.

I admire Parsley's Pics because she never seems to fall down.  She must, of course, because we all do.  Even still, she always has something intelligent to contribute to the conversation.  At the moment, I have nothing to contribute except personal disappointments.  I suppose there's a place for that but only because there seems to be a place for everything - and also because a lot of folks seem pervasively grouchy at the moment.

Things on the home front are so oppressive that I can't even look at that dang John Boehner.  Passing DADT seems to me to be another recruiting technique for an all volunteer military that can't sustain an endless war.  This country will condescend to let our LGBT citizens get killed, but they can't get married.  That's bullshit - especially when you consider that so many marriages are a living hell anyway.  That Artist from the South of France I dated for a little while said that when France instituted something like Domestic Partnerships so that queer couples could have the same rights under the law as married couples - heteros stopped getting married.

I maintain that the only people foaming at the mouth to get to the altar today in America are LGBT.

I have read enough headlines on the internet to determine that Obama is an old school Republican - similar to Bob Dole, maybe, except that I never paid enough attention to Republicans to know one from another.  However, my mother assures me that in the past, there were decent Republicans.  When I think of Bob Dole, I think of Viagra and how he must have made a bundle off it since prescription plans pay for Viagra even though they often won't pay for birth control pills.

My mother also says that Bill Clinton is Republican Lite, and since Obama can't do enough to turn himself into Bill Clinton, we can conclude that Barack Obama is a Republican.  The Republicans, therefore, are so conservative that I don't even know what to call them.  I never learned the difference between all those political factions back in World War II, like Fascists and Marxists and Nazis.  I know Fascists were in Italy, Marxists in Russia (sort of) and Nazis were in Germany, but all I know for sure is that Republicans aren't Marxists or Socialists unless they're trying to boss around somebody in their own neighborhood.  For example, when a country club in Houston wanted to build condos around the perimeter, the neighbors in the fancy houses across the street interfered with the property owner's sovereign right to do what he wanted with his own damn golf course.  I can't remember the whole story - I just know that when they commenced argufying, the neighborhood water district refused to sell water to the country club in order to force the property owner to capitulate to the demands of the neighborhood rich guys - which might make the neighbors kind of like the Israelis.  I don't know what the Israelis are either - I just know they understand how to use water for political and social purposes.

The fight between the Country Club and the Neighbors was about to get serious when Hurricane Ike hit and did enough minor damage to the country club so that the property owner could get wads and wads of FEMA money - ergo: everyone is now happy down at Raveneaux.   Although I'm sure I've got details and facts wrong in this tale, the moral remains the same:  Those damn Republicans are all for individual rights until those rights interfere with their own personal interests.  Double Standards and Total Bullshit prevail. And these Republicans aren't even Tea Baggers, although they may give money to Tea Baggers.  That's Entertainment not Politics.

Anyway, I hate those motherfuckers which is another reason I just couldn't see moving to Texas right now.  When the Christian Fiction section in Barnes & Noble is bigger than Personal Finance or Bargain Books, you know you're in trouble.  Maybe I'll move to Texas next year.  Maybe I'll hit megamillions and buy a small island country and turn it into a Hippie Haven.  My advisors' job would be to prevent me from following my natural inclinations and turning into Imelda Marcos or whoever that woman was in South America.  Madonna played her in the movie:

Was Evita Bad or Good? I don't know. I just like the outfits.

I'll be driving through the snow this afternoon to join VeryMissMary in Connecticut.  She got a recipe from a restaurant she loves on Amsterdam Avenue for a drink that is much like Egg Nog, except that it's really Creme Anglaise and turns into a beverage that is rather like a Vanilla Brandy Alexander.

After you make the Creme Angliase, you mix in the Five Dirty Browns:  Rum, Bourbon, Cognac, Brandy and some other whiskey.  It's tasty and it kicks your ass, which means it's now my favorite drink.  We're going to mix up a batch and invite that tasty boiler repair man over for cocktails.  Things with the Young Socialist are not progressing as I would have liked because he doesn't get off work until 10:00 at night and then because he lives and works deep in Brooklyn, it would mean at least an hour subway ride for him to get to my place.  All well and good if you're planning a sleep-over, but that's out of the question until Velvet heads out for the Wyoming Rockies in mid-February.  Hence, an exploratory mission with the Boiler Repair Man.

I like the idea simply because the opportunity for punning is virtually endless.  It's just that I suck at puns, so somebody else will have to do the punning.  Here's me and VeryMissMary when we got held for ransom at the Chanel counter at a Lord & Taylor in Connecticut:

We may do some live blogging on her site once we get the mixture right.  She hasn't updated her blog since the last time I was inclined and sober enough to type.  Eventually, we're going to brew up some herb tea also because one of our aspirations is to turn a small village into Vicodinville and become like the Misses Emily and Mamie Baldwin on the Waltons.  Or Bartles & James.


mac said...

Do you mean puns like, "Your nose runs and your feet smell"?
Or like double entendre things?

Either way, a pun can be fun... There's one about not switching channels in here somewhere...

Political stuff intrigues me. I don't understand it all 'cause I'm just a dumb old country boy. But I am fascinated by the processes.
I do know, however, that Obama can't be both a nazi and a commie like those tea party guys proclaim. They're opposite ends of the spectrum

Susan Tiner said...

You can tell a lot about a town by the size of he Christian Fiction section. Also the number of churches per square mile.

Be careful with those Brandy Alexanders.

tnlib said...

Thank you, sweetie, but I'm in a bit of a rut myself at the moment. Not because there's nothing to write about but quite the opposite. Where oh where does one begin? It's all so overwhelming and a bit depressing as you say.

Your mom is right. Once upon a time there were some Republicans who were considered decent and even intelligent. I know it's hard to believe these days but it's really true.

Be careful this weekend but have a good time and let it flow - whatever that lethal potent is.

Jennifer said...

Young Socialist? I've been away too long.

Oh ya - politics. I'm having trouble even paying attention anymore because it's ALL turning to entertainment. With information manipulation taken straight from tv advertisers. Ugh. It is depressing, and I really admire all my progressive blogger friends for keeping your voices out there. Call me a wussy, but I'm not woman enough to stand up and stare down that creepy circus freak show day after day.

Cheers you two. Have a wonderful time. Woohoo drunk blogging!

Lisa said...

I laughed out loud at this about ten times. And I'm not even drinking!

Jaliya said...

I so want to hit a Chanel counter with you! I also want one of those divine drinks :-)

About politics ... the loonies are indeed running the asylum ...


intelliwench said...

Sounds like you've got some good plans there. Maybe I need to rethink my hibernation strategy....

PENolan said...

Intelli, we are hibernating for sure. We may have to run a couple of errands, but the snow is lovely, the roads are clear and I brought my silk pointelle snuggies ;)

Jaliya - I wish to G*d (or the Dog, if you prefer) that you could. One of these days . . .

Lisa, I wasn't drinking either. At least not when I wrote it. That's my usual charming self when I'm on my way to work. Thank goodness it's my job to throw ping pong balls at preschoolers. Or at least, that's what I perceive my job to be. I throw them at their parents sometimes, too. Other times, I set out a bunch of prisms so there are rainbows all over the room.

tnlib - More people should listen to my mother. She's very astute about politics, investments and household hints.

Susan, I am so glad to see you back in circulation. Hope you had a great vacation.

Jennifer - A Different Kind of Bar, Stonerdate 12.27.10 I have to confess he's about as political as I feel like getting at the moment although The Boiler Repair Man could prove entertaining - which shows that I prefer my entertainment to be Romantic Comedy instead of Political Tragedy.

mac - I'd say both puns and double entendre. Since my mind is currently in the gutter, I have no finesse. Linguistically, anyway ;)

Vancouver Voyeur said...

You're not the only one having trouble with politics, but then you know my rant already. As for DADT and gay marriage. I could care less about marriage but do care immensely about tax benefits, property rights, inheritance rights, health insurance, etc. Either we all get the benefit of our tax dollars or none of us do. Either we all get to make our families or none of us do. Either we all are treated equally under the law or none of us are. Some people don't see it that way though. I love how my trying to get the same benefits as a citizen that they enjoy is somehow seeking "special rights." Assholes. As for old school Republicans, I think it's more a matter that all this bullshit used to happen, it's just that the public wasn't aware of it as much because we didn't have the 24/7 media coverage of everything. Look at old newspapers and editorial cartoons or read the Congressional Record and other documents of what was said and done and you'll realize, we as a people have always been nasty to one another. The difference I think is that the parties today, Dem/Rep, are more tightly controlled and financing a run for office has become so expensive that you _must_ have the support of the national party (in most cases) to win. If they help you win, you are beholden to vote and behave the way they say. So whereas long ago we could have more moderates and more independent thinking and voting away from one's own party, that's less likely to happen today, so they all behave like one great monster and there's not a lot of room for saner minds to arise. As for leftists, rightists, commies, fascists, socialists, all these terms get thrown around and intermingled as if they all mean the same thing, they're all the scary boogey man to someone. The easiest and most simplistic way I've found to understand them all is to divide them between left and right initially. Left usually leans toward the importance of the rights of the individual over the importance of the nation; and right usually leans toward the importance of the nation over the rights of the individual. This is the theoretical division of these groups, but when you get into practice, they're all, all over the place, because whatever is good for the group in power, they'll do it, even if it's against their party's platform. So communists and socialists would be leftist and fascists and Nazis would be rightists. A good example of how they don't stay true to their platform is the gay marriage issue. Republicans are all about State's Rights. Initially they didn't want the federal government to get involved in the issue of marriage, it was the domain of the State to make the marriage laws. When northern states began moving toward legalizing gay marriage, and the other states feared they might have to recognize these gay marriages from other states, because of the Constitution's "full faith and credit" clause, well then they were all about the federal government defining marriage via the DOMA so that they could "legally" ignore the requirements of the Constitution. That could get me onto another long rant, so I'll stop there. Sorry my response was so long. I've been in Boston since last week and am suffering from severe blog withdrawal and trying to get my fix caught up. :-)

PENolan said...

One of my very best friends was trying to get information on her partner who was in the hospital - and the hospital denied her access because they aren't married. They're domestic partners. By the time Kathleen got through with the hospital, people were in tears apologizing to her.
It's not fair any way you slice it.

I am avoiding politics even more strenuously since the shooting in AZ. People are so full of shit and stupid that I just can't watch.

The only thing that would make me smile is Tom Delay in a prison jumpsuit. But even that won't undue the damage he did to Texas with Redistricting.

Fear and Loathing - that's me.

Vancouver Voyeur said...

Take a breather then come back to the fight.

Makropoulos said...

You make me laugh! Thanks. But yes, I'm laughing to help hold back the tears. . . .

I wonder how you're feeling after the AZ shootings. This is a terrific downer for me.
Hope you had a good visit to Connecticut!

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