Friday, June 24, 2011

Arriving Safely

Velvet is heading off to work in a little while.  He admits that although he is a young man yearning to be out on his own, he likes it when his mother makes him a very berry smoothie and toast with a schmear of salmon cream cheese for breakfast.  He likes asking me to make his lunch for him as he walks off down the hall to the den to watch the new TV.   He didn't mention the yearning to be on his own part all by himself.  I brought it up as he was leaving the kitchen and said, "Thanks, Mommy.  I love you."

He's been eating his breakfast in front of the TV ever since he was a little kid.  He may be watching the cartoons now, for all I know.  The den is so far from the main room where I've stationed my computer that I can't tell what's on the TV.  In the old place, the living room, dining area, kitchen and office/entry space was all in the same 500 foot square.  Or at least I think it was five or six hundred square feet.  Now that we've been here over a week, I don't miss the old place one single bit with the exception of a few conveniences.  I love the view from my bedroom window so much that I may never hang curtains.  Since I'm looking out over the roof of a small college over to the tree tops in a grave yard that slopes uphill, I reckon that nobody can see in my room anyway - even when the light is on in the night.  The headstones peek out from between the trees which, naturally, reminds me of a song:

The only trouble was waiting and waiting for the company who had provided my land line, internet and cable TV to transfer my phone number to the new company since the original company doesn't provide services in my new neighborhood.  I've had this phone number for nearly twenty years, and I wasn't giving it up now just for a few days of internet and cable TV. You can't get decent produce in this neighborhood either, but the big Fairway is a short bus ride away, and they have everything in the world you could possibly want.  Plus, Fresh Direct will deliver straight to my kitchen which is one of the bonuses of urban living.  I haven't noticed Fresh Direct coming to my new building, but I'm pretty sure that folks in my demographic who live in this building settled in long before Fresh Direct was invented and have developed their own solutions.  It appears as if I'm the only white woman in my demographic in the building.

There are plenty of brown women in my demographic who have lived here for years. The white people I have seen all seem to be under 35 and fairly beautiful.   There are so many different kinds of people in this neighborhood that I feel like I'm back in New York City again after having been trapped in a strip mall with Whole Foods at one end, Home Goods at the other and Sephora in between.  I've even seen cute little Latina lesbian couples, one all frilly and the other wearing a hipster butch uniform of tight jeans and dress shirt, neck tie and canvas sneakers walking past an old rasta with his dreads tucked up into a huge black, red and green crocheted hat.  It's summer, and everybody is out in every way on the clean, wide sidewalks of Washington Heights.  It's energizing, inspiring and liberating - like New York City was meant to be.

One thing is certain:  The kids up here are much better behaved than those whiny, noisy, unruly entitled brats whose parents have taken over my old neighborhood.  As unpleasant as the people who took over my neighborhood are, however, I can only be grateful for their money - which has facilitated my current life style and, if all goes according to plan, will continue to facilitate it after I buy a new place and sell it to one of them in ten years for a bundle of fucking cash.  God bless them.

I'm happy to say that I've created an environment here that is balanced combination of Brand New and Comfortably Familiar.  Even though the apartment itself is dramatically different, the allergy medicine and melatonin are in the same basket in the kitchen.  The umbrellas are in the same basket on the hall tree bench, and when you lift the lid on the bench, the same winter hats and scarves are still stuffed inside.  When I wake up in the night, the same moon shines through the window onto my brand new bed with brand new sheets.

There is a brand new man who is also a combination of exciting novelty and safe familiarity.  He found me on Match dot com and took me out to dinner last Friday night, which was perfect timing for a date since Velvet was on a road trip with my dad, driving the Subaru back to Texas. As it happens, this man is also originally from Texas.  He's lived up here forever and easily navigates among the Type A characters who populate the business of corporate media - although he's retired now from MSNBC - but a few generations ago, his family settled in the same area of No Fucking Where, East Texas as my family on my dad's side.

We met at a dark, exotic bar in the East Village, then walked to a restaurant a few blocks away.  When I stepped from the curb to cross the street, he gently touched my lower back.  He had driven into the city, and I had been wondering all day whether or not I'd let him drive me home. That protective, masculine and very gentlemanly gesture convinced me in an instant, and any lingering hesitation disappeared over dinner.  His conversation is a mixture of thoughtful social and political analysis, with counter cultural perspective and Bohemian insight.  It was a lovely night.

He's been busy ever since, working on this documentary about the application of psychedelics in psychiatry.  It's only been a week, of course, and he's called in the meantime.  The other night we wound up talking nearly two hours.  I'm thinking that gender must influence the Space-Time continuum.  Something like Dog Years seems to come into play so that to a man, a week seems like the blink of an eye especially when he's focused on a project.  To a woman, it seems like forever.  At least it seems like Forever to me, but then I've always been impatient.  I'm sure Whoopi Goldberg, as Guinan the Space Mammy, would have something very wise to say about that.



it all sounds lovely and wishing you nothing but the best.

PENolan said...

Granny, it's all so lovely that it feels like the Goddess herself arranged it. Time to light candles in gratitude.

Gail said...

HI TRISH -- lovely post and the transition from point A to point B seemed seamless!! :-)ANd the view from your bedroom window? Perfect. I feel like we moved out and moved back in given all the painting and remodeling we did.
I also love how you described your date. He sounds like a dream. Enjoy your summer Texas.
Love to you

mac said...

I'm glad you're enjying your new home.
I know how wonderful I felt when I got my "own" place after my wife and I split. It is empowering.
I've got a very old cemetary across the street from my house also. Some people think it's not so good, but I think it's beautiful, if kind of somber. They're great neighbors ;-)

I'm glad to see you back online and in action !

Vancouver Voyeur said...

I'm so glad you're back. I was missing your posts. Do take a picture of the view from your window. It sounds so nice for being in the City.

Dusty,Hells most vocal Bitch said...

Awwwwww, this post actually made me miss my son, who currently resides in the lovely southern part of Oklahoma usually reserved for the rightwing nutters.

Lynda said...

Could we please see pics of the apartment furnished?

PENolan said...

Gail - hope your environment is uplifting now that the paint is dry. And he is dreamy. Mesmerizing.

mac, they make very good neighbors.

V.V. Maybe you can see for yourself in September ;)

Lynda, I'll be glad to share once I get a few loose ends tied up.

Dusty - He's a good boy. Hope your's gets out of nutterville soon.

Jennifer said...

Love it all! So happy you're happy. Gosh, don't you love the feeling of *possibilities*?

(I had a touch on the middle of my back once. I never forgot it. I'll never forget him.)

PENolan said...

Jennifer, all I have to say is

I'm off to Macy's to run up my charge card on everything from kitchen organizers to lingerie.

Cali said...

I'm SO glad you love your new home. It's really important. I know because I have a love/hate relationship with mine.

Good luck with the new man. I've given up. I just can't take the disappointment anymore, and they're always disappointing to me in one way or another. Here in Bum Fuck, CA it's pretty hard for me to find someone who is in political, intellectual, emotional and sexual harmony. Either he can't be found, he's 20 years younger and wants kids of his own or he's married to someone else. *sigh* Thankfully I'm menopausal and don't have much of the old "urge to merge" anymore.

Besides, I'm just not healthy enough these days to inflict myself on anyone else. Oh, and I almost died this week of a two-centimeter bleeding ulcer I didn't know I had. But a stomach pumping, an endoscopic procedure and three units of other people's blood later and I'm alright. And hey, I finally can eat white bread or Cap'n Crunch guilt-free. It's the low fiber diet-- vegies cooked to death, soft fruit peeled, pepper ground to dust, no beans, no salads, no whole kernel corn, especially popcorn. Some of it sucks, but some is fun-- for now.

PENolan said...

Sheesh, Cali
Scary Stuff!
Glad you got a diagnosis and a plan.

I hear you on the man front, though. Life seems to be a cycle of anticipation and disappointment no matter who you are.

Hopefully, I will not be disappointed today at Target shopping for housewares. It pains me to walk into the store since the CEO and his wife both donated the maximum amount allowed by law to that Crazy Michelle Bachman - but they've got what I need at the price I want to pay and I've already shopped all over town looking for the same shit somewhere else.

Feel better soon!

Makropoulos said...

Hey congrats on the new place, and the new beau! Sounds almost good 'nuff to convince me to try internet dating again. Almost.

Wish I was in NYC! What was the bar that you met this guy at called? I used to live in the East Village --

dissed said...

This gives me a feeling of great satisfaction. Sometimes, things just work. You deserve this, and you've certainly earned it.

PENolan said...

dissed, he was a cameraman on the original MTV crew, AND you should see his boots. He'll be in town for an event on Thursday, and I've invited him to stay over. Velvet will be with his father since Mommy's having Company.
As it happens, I've got a Canada party to attend that night down in the East Village again. Mak, we met at Temple Bar
I'm not sure how long it's been there since I'm normally over at KGB on E 4th just off 2nd. The Canada Day party is in the same neighborhood.
It's pretty easy to get to from here. A couple of train changes, but one's just right across the platform.

Susan Tiner said...

I'm so glad to hear you like the new apartment, Velvet is home, you're dating a man you like, and Velvet has a job!

How's the shoulder?

PENolan said...

It's okay, Susan, thanks for asking. The new doctor has sent me for deep tissue physical therapy and we'll take another look in six weeks. My rheumatologist thinks that's just fine. May still have to get a needle biopsy to accurately diagnosis whether it's rheumatoid arthritis or osteo or both - but everyone is good with waiting to see how the PT progresses. So far, so excellent with that. The anti-inflammatory has helped a lot, too.

There may be surgery in my future, but not this year :)

Jaliya said...

So glad that you and Velvet are nesting in your new home. Glad, too, that you had a delightful conversation with your date.

I'm with Cali about men in general, though. I'm done, for now. Someone I've known about a decade came out of the woodwork a while ago, wanting to take me out. We were on Skype, and he told me, 'You're just as attractive as you ever were!" I couldn't say "Bye" fast enough, because I had to burst out laughing. Lust is blind ...

Keep your eyes and intuition open, honey. xoxo

Cali said...

@Jaliya- That happened to me, too, except in person! Only I burst into gales of laughter, right in his face! I just couldn't help it. I mean, we BOTH knew he was lying through his teeth. He laughed with me, but he knew he'd been shot down.

Jaliya said...

Gainan would say something like, "What's a couple thousand years between friends?'

Jaliya said...

@Cali -- OMG!! :-D

Your note reminds me that I have had my own idiotic moment with a former (unrequited) flame. Long story short: I encountered him at a professional gathering that I arrived late for. He stood up in this room of about 20 people, grinning his face off, and when I realized who he was (other than a *really lovely man*!), the first thing out of my mouth was "John! You're just as gorgeous as ever!"

... I might have felt some resonance if Skype-man had said something honest, like "God, honey, you look like shit. You have been through the *wringer*, haven't you." I would have burst out laughing there, too ... from relief and friendly feeling. There's nothing like reality being recognized :-D

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